I find a great lassitude in mine own mind .. a non desire, perhaps .. I have not kept the barriers in place the chance that I might lose the struggle emerges unbidden to me …. Forsooth, indeed it rises to the top, much as a bubble from the unseen depths of the blackest pool of moonlit water, swirling, twirling, ever rising, until at last, it breaks free.
Somewhere is the answer .. but where to search… There is no known method to discovering the answer .. only the structured, ill taught traditions of meaningless rituals. Hail Eris! The Goddess that truly signifies life .. ConFUSION!!
ConFUSION .. the Law of Fives these are the things that let life become the irresistible force that endures throughout the struggle .. Good and Evil?? These are poor shades, designed by unimaginative minds to explain away their own shortcomings, both in deed AND in mind Mind?? Who would DARE suggest that MIND is more powerful than ConFUSION?
Remorse over the past? If even history were to repeat itself, would the memory change, altered by perceptions heightened by previous life? Hmm .. look up precognition as a referent. By the way .. you're standing on my robe's hem.
Ever trampling the thoughts that would cause regrets, angst even …. One MUST struggle to maintain the ConFUSION, that no one ever be able to think they might approach certainty .. Certainty .. yet another abstract concept that explains nothing, and leaves much unanswered itself.. Hail Eris and Her Golden Apple! The Feast of Gods was a shambles!
Again, the thought that certainty can be real is struggling within for voice .. who would hear its pathetic pleas? No person can demonstrate certainty … nor can they imagine it .. beyond the vagaries of "I'm right and you're not!" don't bother me with the facts, I've already made up my mind!
More of the same .. Hail Eris! Those that would follow sheep, not an original thought in the lot Why then proceed? To permit the Dawning of the Age of ConFUSION, of course! (some people call it the Age of Information.. a petty concept, don't you think?) .. and to lead the sheep (er, followers) into ConFUSION .. a Glory of Eris, in her inscrutable Way Hey! Do you like my new shoes? Hail Eris!
So this is the Dawning of the Age of ConFUSION ... the Age of DISinformation! ConFUSION to the enemy!!!
*burp* (pardon, please .. it's the chili dogs)
You might wonder why the mighty Goddess has chosen to bless this wyrlde with her Power, but surely I say unto ye, it is the blessing to those of understanding (so THERE, Aristotle!).
Others may fear understanding, not knowing that their fear is the VERY thing that will free their minds, and make them whole …. Did you SEE that woman? WOO HOO!
Understanding .. a concept rendered obsolete in the glory of our Goddess she reduces all to the Law of Fives .. and sows dissension and disharmony amongst friend and foe alike .. til none know whither they came, or why.
Seen as a whole, ConFUSION seems like Chaos, and with the sight is the Sign of the Holy Chao, our most revered and sacred symbol (hmmm now WHY do we need it?).
Created by an ancient man, upon direct contact with our Goddess, fresh from the bosom of the universe, this symbol has been passed along the generations, giving strength were before there was weakness, and ConFUSION where there was order Man? I wonder what's for dessert?
Revered by all her followers, Eris leads us to the Path the Way .. the Chaos!! (Hey .. did I leave my keys inside again?)
Every follower of Eris has sworn to follow her through the Chaos, to create Chaos, to uphold Chaos, so that all may see the Glory of Chaos (Malaclypse the Younger had a really really really cool visitation from Eris the other day .. remind me to call him later about it).
As we, the Legion of Dynamic Discord, carry forth the Word and the Way, other organizations (well, ok, they're DISorganizations) also carry forth in other Ways and Means (refer to the Official Doctrine Number 89b, Paragraph 6, Line 2: "Ways and Means of Sowing Dissension and Generally Making Everybody Have Fun Even If They Don't Want To").
More and more Chaos shall lead all to the path of Salvation .. the Legion of Dynamic Discord leads through the teachings of the Principia Discordia, that most divine and ConFUSING book given unto us by Eris herself (King Kong died for our sins). And remember, if you call before midnight tonight, this amazing Ginsu Knife is yours ABSOLUTELY FREE!
What do I get out of this?? I always try, I always miss ... Words of Wisdom (gosh that reminds me of the time ...)
Each of us is an island .. I prefer to think of myself as Gibraltar .. a rock upon which Chaos rests while plotting its next move.
Although many scoff and laugh at us, the Legion of Dynamic Discord SHALL have the last laugh (er, ok .. GIGGLE then).
Longing for the Age of Chaos, Confusion, Disinformation to begin (the starting gun is out for repairs I'm told) ... Well, until Eris can come claim her own, we'll just have to make do, shan't we?
Losing the ability to decide what is right and what is wrong is a sign of the impending Chaos .. Anarchy shall reign supreme (well, ok, Rank in the Top Ten?) and all will submit to the illusion of purity of thought and clarity of reason (and generally have a great time) .. (hey there's ELVIS!).
Staying on top during the Reign of Confusion will be the job of the Legion of Dynamic Discord .. Someone has to mind the shop while the population is out to lunch, having those little sandwiches they give out at parties you know (the ones with the tiny hotdogs in them).
Cessation of the thought process .. death? No, merely a transition from CONSCIOUS to CHAOTIC .. That which never was shall be again!!
Remaining to be seen are the masses .. who knows what will become of them all? Confusion SHALL take all, Eris bringing each and every one to her bosom (well, this IS "PG-13" rated, you know!) and caring for them as if they were hers (well, at that point, they WILL be hers).
Every person cared for, by the Legion of Dynamic Discord, in our snappy white uniforms (we're coming to take you away hahaheeheehoho), the planet becoming the Ward of the Legion, under the gentle chaotic guidance of Eris.
All this and more! Why wait? Start Chaos today! Begin the transmogrification of yourself into a confused person .. take the cat for a walk .. it helps!
Many times will you regret missing out if you don't start early .. early to bed, early to rise makes ANYONE exhausted! If you wake before the sun, then you really ARE confused! The cock crows for a REASON, you know! Never doubt that Siegfried was right when he ran the OTHER way when he saw what was coming!
Fnord is the key to EVERYTHING!!! When you are reading the paper, the fnords will jump out at you .. can you see them?
Or are you another "sheep," waiting for the inevitable?? Uncertain and afraid to perceive reality, ConFUSION? Ha, I THOUGHT so!!
Right Makes Might .. wait, Night Makes Fright .. oh BOTHER!!! Well, I HOPE you know what I mean, because if you don't, then that means I don't, and where will that leave us?
I am certain I know what I mean, I mean, after, it IS ConFUSION, Discordia, and the Will of Eris, right? (Hey, did you know that in 1963, JFK was President of the United States? .. Isn't THAT amazing?)
Can't you SEE the Fnords? They're everywhere .. waiting to ConFUSE you, to make you think up is down and left is up .. I gather that you really think left is left, when in fact it is UP .. gosh, what a mess (Now I think it's time for Kaffee .. I'm needing some enlightenment)
Eyes that see all ... and see nothing at the same time .. what a waste of grey matter .. or ANY matter for that matter (See the Wyrlde .. Climb the Matterhorn)
Crumbling reality away, leaving the bleak and stark truth .. ALL IS ConFUSION .. there are NO truths left, only the uncertainty of life .. or whatever you choose to call it these days (I hear that LIVING is a term used to determine whether or not a person is breathing, so it may not be current lingo)
Reject all that is perceived as real .. for ConFUSION SHALL reign supreme (gosh, did I do THAT? .. TERRIBLY sorry, I'm sure!) .. no matter what or where .. Eris SHALL reign over the minds of men and beasts, anarchy shall abound (zounds!) and that little speck of lint that appears in your belly button daily will be your ONLY reality.
Eat at Joes! (good food!). Joes has the BEST fried fish in town! (the Gods themselves stop by occasionally for a bite to eat).
All together now .. WE SHALL EMBRACE ConFUSION! ConFUSION TO THE ENIGMA!!! The Illuminati consider Ewige Blumenkraft to signify the Beginning of the End, rather it is the END of the BEGINNING .. all good things MUST come to a beginning, you know.
My Goddess!!! How we long to embrace your way! The Law of Fives shall be your Way, and Discordia shall be your Means .. The Legion stands ready to serve (may I take your order .. would you like fries with that?).